Monday, April 30, 2007

Lets go fly a kite, up to the highest height.......


A fitting tune from Mary Poppins I must say. But I'll explain that as we go on.

The move has been excellent so far. The Bexhill people seem genuinely nice. Its a regular thing to have a chat with a shop assistant about just stuff. The house is great too, we have emptied ALL of the boxes. (did you catch that ALL OF THEM!)

Work has tried to dampen my spirits by not supplying a broadband connection for a month, and when they did it came with the wrong sort of modem. I work for a technology company who don't seem to know how to supply and install technology. That's not even covering my office kit which hasn't arrived at all. But stuff em I say! It ain't my problem its their's.

A couple of things that have made living here that bit special so far are the older people and flying kites!

Let me tell you about the oldies in Bexhill. This area is know for being a place for older people to retire, and I'm not surprised its a very nice. So far though the oldies seem to come in 2 forms. There's the Schumachers and the Shouters. The Shumachers own the electric disabled carts and hurtle about the place. I thought old people were meant to me sedate, but no. The Shumachers of Bexhill only go one speed in there jet propelled trolleys and that is fast. Forget the other speeds it can do. They belt it about cutting up the youths who are genuinely scared of them knocking over bins and making a nuisance of themselves. I'm lucky because if one decides to have a go at me I recon I'd be the winner but for the skinnier people about they'd go over like bowling pins. The Schumachers have very little to do with the other group whom I affectionately know as that Shouters. These people are happy taking things a bit slower and generally speaking are very amiable and friendly people. That is if you can get past that fact that they shout all the time. WHAT TIME IS IT? or NICE WEATHER WE ARE HAVING? and when you reply they say WHAT, WHAAAAT? You need to plug your ears with cotton wool to speak to a shouter just so you can catch what they are saying without making your ears bleed. In fact I recon it wasn't the Island that made the plane crash in LOST but rather a Bexhill Shouter that sent the plane spinning. Bexhill shouters don't have to be like this, almost all of them have hearing devices so they could hear themselves and others without causing landslides and avalanches all over the world. The trouble is they don't know how to switch the things on, and when they do the screeching feedback makes dogs whimper. I'm sure that when they visit the doctor about tinnitus that 9/10 times its the hearing aid needing adjusting or turning off. I'm looking into developing cheap and efficient noise reducing ear plugs and muffs as a service to the local community. Of course at a small profit to myself! Its funny as the only people that can tame a Shumacher is a Shouter, who can use their sonic abilities to knock the Schumachers from their crazy rampage. The poor Shumachers are dazed in confusion when you look at their faces whilst the wheels on their supersonic shopping pods are pointing upwards. Its like looking at a beetle struggle on its back. Watching the shenanigans of this strange folk has brought me and the family many hours of entertainment already!

The other thing that has made the move special is flying kites down by the sea! It's great we've been down there a few times now. This week I bought myself a new stunt kite that has the warning not for the under 10 years olds! So i take it that means its good, and I'm going to try it out sometime soon. And this is where the Mary Poppins kite flying references comes in. I almost want to start shouting SUPERCALLAFRAG............ but i think i can hold off on that.

That's my update for now. I'll tell you about any other groups of special Bexhill residence that I come across in future updates. Sorry about the delay with this update but that's down to my companies incompetence.

all the best and keep blogging
Chux

7 comments:

jomoore said...

Hooray - you're back! Congratulations on your new abode and the discovery of such a characterful place. What a joy!

The Addlestone Schumachers and Shouters are boy racers and hoodies - I'd much prefer your lot!

I'm so envious of your new seaside life (especially the kite flying - it doesn't get better than that). One day...

Delmonti said...

Did you feel the quake down there in Bexhill?

chux said...

No, thanks for asking - would have made a top post on this blog though wouldnt it. Thats as long as I wasnt eaten by the ground or had a house fall on me. Would have been interesting to see how many mobility scooters where knocked over,

PieEater said...

Welcome back sexy. Glad your having fun swanning around the sea side. Just watch out for the third category of old people. You'll find one soon enough being by the beach and all. They'll start appearing once you've been their a month or two. The ones that start mistaking you for their son/grandson and try and hug you and ask how their sisters doing and how their grandaughters piano grade 3 went. Beware

Clare said...

I love kite flying!! See blog/flickr for pictures! Phil and I often go to Butser hill in Hampshire to fly one on a Sunday.
Oh and on an old people/hearing aid note: my grandma was considerably deaf. When we'd ask if she was wearing her aid the answer was invariably "yes". Is it on, grandma? "no dear, it wastes the batteries..."

MaryB said...

Yea, Chux! You're back!

You'd better be careful spilling the beans about your new surroundings. Why, the pub shed in the back was reason enough for me to pack my bags and come for a visit, but add kite-flying to that and, well, I'm on the next plane over! Sounds heavenly -

Liz Hinds said...

That's a brilliant description of the Schumachers and Shouters. Ah, you'll be one yourself one day, lad!